Planet Swans ArchivesThe worst side in Premiership history. The poor (inbred) cousins of FEC. A small town in Mansfield. Less points than my driving licence. Your manager scores more than you do. The poor folks of Darby have heard them all over the past twelve months and beyond as they struggle to come to terms with their delusion that they are not a big club. Not by any stretch of the imagination.
Darby finally won their annual match last weekend which puts us in a good position as it is likely to be twelve months before the next one (I believe they have pencilled in their local derby against Chesterfield) and they will be backed by a massifff 450 fans at the Liberty tomorrow. Big club? Fecking Havant bought more than that. And they beat us which is more than Darby will do.
You have to marvel at Darby though. Let's start with their Chairman. He jumped ship from Hull for the "big club" in Darby. Now one was relegated from the Premier League as the laughing stock of the footballing world whilst the other is currently occupying a lofty position having won twice as many games in their first four as Darby managed all season. Good business decision Adam darling.
Then there is their manager. Forget the Sunday tabloid headlines that bring much mirth and merriment to opposition fans here we have a man charged with rebuilding the sleeping giant. But for some reason he took the Darby job instead. Nice one Paul baby.
And of course then you get the two together in transfer dealings. Tweedledumb and Tweedledumber as they are commonly known probably have difficulty in securing a loaf of bread from Tescos. Imagine the scenario
Tescos staff "That will be 39p Mr Pearson"
AP: "I'll give you 8p plus 31p when we win ten games"
Tescos: "That will be 39p Mr Pearson"
AP: "Make it 11p and 28p when we win the Champions League"
Tescos: "That will be 39p Mr Pearson"
AP: "The loaf of bread has already found a bread bin at Pride Park"
Tescos: "That will be 39p Mr Pearson"
Paul Jewell: "We have no interest in buying the loaf of bread"
Tescos: "We Don't want to sell so thats the matter closed."
AP: "Hello, Tescos is that loaf of bread for sale?"
Tescos: "That will be 39p Mr Pearson"
AP: "I'll give you 4p and 50p if we win the World Cup"
Tescos: "That will be 39p Mr Pearson"
AP: "Get a press release out – Tescos have moved the goalposts"
It doesn't bode well in the negotiation terms does it? Never let them loose on a car boot sale.
Don't get me wrong I don't hate Darby, I pity them for certain, empathise with them definitely and despise them just a little bit but I don't hate them. After all living in the shadow of Moansfailed cannot be easy.
Anyway, that’s time to sign off for now. Watch out for the taxi to roll in tomorrow with their away support because *sniff* Swansea is just such a *sniff* hard place to get to *sniff* on a Tuesday night *sniff* and we all have *sniff* community service to *sniff* do tomorrow. Get behind your team or were you all there for the big teams last time around?
Have a great day 😀 love Mark x
