Secret Diary – 27 – 3 Sep

Monday, 3 September 2001, 0:00
2 mins read

Monday 27 August

Cheltenham at the Vetch today. We won the game 2-2 on away goals even though we were at home, I think. Whatever, we are still unbeaten in the league this season if you forget Lincoln and we are unbeaten since I got here if you forget every game that we have lost. Young Stuart scored the first goal today which was pleasing for him, lucky I didn’t sell him to Rotherham in the summer or he wouldn’t have scored.

Tuesday 28 August

I sent a spy along to the Supporter’s Trust meeting last night. I don’t think anyone noticed him, I sent him in a good disguise that I found in the prop room. A seven foot Swan outfit. He reported back and said that the meeting went well and they made ร‚ยฃ2000 from the auction, at least that will pay my wages for another three weeks.

Wednesday 29 August

We have a new player – Mike Tyson. I have been looking for a heavyweight midfielder and he fits just the bill. I was a bit surprised to find out that he was only 19, he must have won the world title when he was about six. He will play in our next game, probably at right back but I may slot him into a place on the substitutes bench before he goes back as I only signed him for a month. I rang Mr McIntosh about him but he said that he had never heard of him which is a bit worrying.

Thursday 30 August

Some of the players didn’t turn up for training today. Alan said they were Under 21 which meant that they didn’t have to but I told him that I had to train at Chelsea when I was under 21. I will fine them when they eventually do turn up, that nice Mr Lewis needs all the money he can get. Maybe he can buy another football club or two.

Friday 31 August

Mr Lewis and that funny man up the road, Mr KeemaNan arranged a behind closed doors friendly between us and Cardiff. I protested to Mr Lewis as I said that I need to get into the game rather than watch behind a closed door but he explained that I would be able to watch and that was what the supporters meant when they said close the door behind you John. We lost the game 1-0 which is our first defeat of the season but as a friendly it doesn’t count towards league points which is a shame as the one point for a defeat would have helped.

Saturday 1 September

Away game at Plymouth today. I went down on the bus but the rest of the lads played a prank on me by not turning up. The Plymouth team must have been in on the joke as they didn’t turn up neither. Never mind, it was an enjoyable game of football which finished 0-0 even though there wasn’t much action in the game. Still, we are now two games unbeaten, five if you forget Lincoln.

Sunday 2 September

I spent the day recovering after watching England beating Germany 5-1 yesterday. England had a good striker up front who I think could do a job for us. I had a word with the Italian player we have, David Rome, as he says he can speak French (I can’t work that out) to have a word with Mr Houdini at Anfield to see if I can get him in on loan. He is only young so I cannot imagine he is playing first team football there and his wages at that age should not be a problem.
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