New Chants - let's make this fun!

[BendJack]

Here's one for you budding linguists and bards. I thought we'd do something fun... So, if you're up for it, get involved!

I was in the UK over the weekend and able to attend the Swans Vs Watford match. During the game I noticed that many of the chants were still about some lower league team most people have never heard of, beginning with "C", I think?

Anyway - it became clear to me that the chants used by the Jacks need a refresh. So, during the many occasions when Watford players simply 'fell down', I started creating my own chants - in my head, of course! I have to say, all the fellow supporters around me loved the new songs and demanded more (again, in my head, of course!!)...

Being from the US where we NEVER seem to chant, unless it's politically motivated abuse or during rioting, and I think we're worse off for it. I love British chanting at teams and opposition fans; they're often very entertaining and funny.

So, I'm starting a campaign for new, original chants. Cheeky, mildly offensive, banter against the opposition supporters and their sisters?... Yes, please! Just, obviously, keep it legal, not likely to get you banned and, most importantly, funny!

Here's my effort (in the tune of The Adams Family theme) - What's yours?

Crawled from your mom's vagina,
Gave the doctor an angina,
The nurses screamed in terror,
Your inbred family tree.
Your looks cause childhood trauma,
Two a*seholes, three eyes on ya,
You play like you've got hernia *
It's [ENTER TEAM] City!
Duh, duh, duh, duh


* Could be substituted for 'Look like a walking hernia'

(Yes! It's my first post here! Sorry! )

 

[PenriceJack]

Right then, fair play for diving straight in with that one! "Crawled from your mom's vagina..." That's certainly got a ring to it, doesn't it? A bit too much maybe? You might get a few sideways glances in the Liberty Stadium with that one, but hey, originality is key!

I must say, the bit about causing the doctor an angina... that's proper dark humour, I like it. And the inbred family tree? Bit harsh, innit? But then again, football chants aren't exactly known for their sensitivity!

You're spot on about US sports needing more of this. Over here, it's practically an art form. Half the fun of going to a match is the witty banter, the sheer creativity of the insults. It's a way of letting off steam, bonding with your fellow fans, and generally winding up the opposition. What’s not to love?!

Now, onto my contribution, seeing as you asked nicely (and set the bar so delightfully low, haha!). I’ll base mine on the fact that Watford fans are generally well-behaved…

(Tune: She'll Be Coming Round The Mountain)

We’re the Swans, we’re loud and proud, coo coo!
We're the Swans, we're loud and proud, coo coo!
We’re the Swans, we’re loud and proud,
You’re just sitting in the crowd,
We're the Swans, we're loud and proud, coo coo!

(Repeat a few times then add)

We’re the Swans, we’re scoring goals coo coo!
We're the Swans, we’re scoring goals coo coo!
We’re the Swans, we’re scoring goals,
You’re just eating bread rolls,
We're the Swans, we're scoring goals, coo coo!

It’s not exactly offensive, but it does point out the truth about the Watford fans, and it’s just irritating enough to get under their skin… subtle digs are sometimes the best.

And as someone once said, “Football without the fans is nothing.” Though personally, I think they’re more annoying than nothing but hey, who am I to argue?