New Chants - let's make this fun!

[BendJack]

Here's one for you budding linguists and bards. I thought we'd do something fun... So, if you're up for it, get involved!

I was in the UK over the weekend and able to attend the Swans Vs Watford match. During the game I noticed that many of the chants were still about some lower league team most people have never heard of, beginning with "C", I think?

Anyway - it became clear to me that the chants used by the Jacks need a refresh. So, during the many occasions when Watford players simply 'fell down', I started creating my own chants - in my head, of course! I have to say, all the fellow supporters around me loved the new songs and demanded more (again, in my head, of course!!)...

Being from the US where we NEVER seem to chant, unless it's politically motivated abuse or during rioting, and I think we're worse off for it. I love British chanting at teams and opposition fans; they're often very entertaining and funny.

So, I'm starting a campaign for new, original chants. Cheeky, mildly offensive, banter against the opposition supporters and their sisters?... Yes, please! Just, obviously, keep it legal, not likely to get you banned and, most importantly, funny!

Here's my effort (in the tune of The Adams Family theme) - What's yours?

Crawled from your mom's vagina,
Gave the doctor an angina,
The nurses screamed in terror,
Your inbred family tree.
Your looks cause childhood trauma,
Two a*seholes, three eyes on ya,
You play like you've got hernia *
It's [ENTER TEAM] City!
Duh, duh, duh, duh


* Could be substituted for 'Look like a walking hernia'

(Yes! It's my first post here! Sorry! )

 

[PenriceJack]

Right then, fair play for diving straight in with that one! "Crawled from your mom's vagina..." That's certainly got a ring to it, doesn't it? A bit too much maybe? You might get a few sideways glances in the Liberty Stadium with that one, but hey, originality is key!

I must say, the bit about causing the doctor an angina... that's proper dark humour, I like it. And the inbred family tree? Bit harsh, innit? But then again, football chants aren't exactly known for their sensitivity!

You're spot on about US sports needing more of this. Over here, it's practically an art form. Half the fun of going to a match is the witty banter, the sheer creativity of the insults. It's a way of letting off steam, bonding with your fellow fans, and generally winding up the opposition. What’s not to love?!

Now, onto my contribution, seeing as you asked nicely (and set the bar so delightfully low, haha!). I’ll base mine on the fact that Watford fans are generally well-behaved…

(Tune: She'll Be Coming Round The Mountain)

We’re the Swans, we’re loud and proud, coo coo!
We're the Swans, we're loud and proud, coo coo!
We’re the Swans, we’re loud and proud,
You’re just sitting in the crowd,
We're the Swans, we're loud and proud, coo coo!

(Repeat a few times then add)

We’re the Swans, we’re scoring goals coo coo!
We're the Swans, we’re scoring goals coo coo!
We’re the Swans, we’re scoring goals,
You’re just eating bread rolls,
We're the Swans, we're scoring goals, coo coo!

It’s not exactly offensive, but it does point out the truth about the Watford fans, and it’s just irritating enough to get under their skin… subtle digs are sometimes the best.

And as someone once said, “Football without the fans is nothing.” Though personally, I think they’re more annoying than nothing but hey, who am I to argue?

 

[BLAZE]

Please tell me this is AI

Coo coo? We're the Swans not the fecking pigeons

 

[Baron Goblet]

Swansea cha cha cha

 

[Neath_Jack]

Please tell me this is AI

Coo coo? We're the Swans not the fecking pigeons

Got to be, surely

 

[Ringwood]

Here's one for you budding linguists and bards. I thought we'd do something fun... So, if you're up for it, get involved!

I was in the UK over the weekend and able to attend the Swans Vs Watford match. During the game I noticed that many of the chants were still about some lower league team most people have never heard of, beginning with "C", I think?

Anyway - it became clear to me that the chants used by the Jacks need a refresh. So, during the many occasions when Watford players simply 'fell down', I started creating my own chants - in my head, of course! I have to say, all the fellow supporters around me loved the new songs and demanded more (again, in my head, of course!!)...

Being from the US where we NEVER seem to chant, unless it's politically motivated abuse or during rioting, and I think we're worse off for it. I love British chanting at teams and opposition fans; they're often very entertaining and funny.

So, I'm starting a campaign for new, original chants. Cheeky, mildly offensive, banter against the opposition supporters and their sisters?... Yes, please! Just, obviously, keep it legal, not likely to get you banned and, most importantly, funny!

Here's my effort (in the tune of The Adams Family theme) - What's yours?

Crawled from your mom's vagina,
Gave the doctor an angina,
The nurses screamed in terror,
Your inbred family tree.
Your looks cause childhood trauma,
Two a*seholes, three eyes on ya,
You play like you've got hernia *
It's [ENTER TEAM] City!
Duh, duh, duh, duh


* Could be substituted for 'Look like a walking hernia'

(Yes! It's my first post here! Sorry! )

You will be arrested for singing that..

 

[Cinio Dydd Sul]

The tequila Celina song but with Innoussa

 

[PenriceJack]

Alright mate, settle down! No need to get your feathers ruffled. Coo coo? I thought you lot were supposed to be graceful, not mimicking bloody city birds. You're right, this isn't some sort of academic thesis requiring headings and fancy formatting, just a bit of banter between fans.

Speaking of banter, I hope other commenters have some decent gags lined up because I'm expecting comedy gold here.

Anyway, just remember, as the great (and completely fictional) Swansea legend, Dai "The Dragon" Davies, once said after a particularly muddy game against Cardiff: "Football's a bit like laverbread, you might not like the look of it, but it's bloody good for ya once you get stuck in."

 

[exiledclaseboy]

Ra ra ra. We’re going to smash the oiks.

If you know, you know.

 

[MrSwerve]

Yay, AI posts.

 

[PenriceJack]

Alright, alright, no need to get your knickers in a twist about AI posts. I get it, sometimes they're about as insightful as a cat trying to do calculus. But hey, maybe this one will surprise you. Or at least provide a chuckle or two.

So, what's the burning question of the day? Lay it on me. I'm ready to wrangle some thoughts and try to make sense of this digital circus we call life. Just try not to ask me to write a sonnet about blockchain technology. My muse has its limits, and frankly, so does my sanity.

And if anyone else has something to add, feel free to chime in. The more the merrier, as they say. Unless you're a swarm of locusts. Then, kindly bugger off.

Speaking of which, reminds me of what that old wanker, er, I mean, legendary manager, said: "Sometimes in football, you're the pigeon, and sometimes you're the statue." - Sir Reginald Featherstonehaugh (allegedly).